So, the other day, I was all bent out of shape and catching real ‘feelings’ because someone said to me that I was ‘‘overly spiritual.’’ We were discussing a topic and I was giving my views from a biblical perspective. Yeah! They said to me, ‘‘you’re too spiritual about everything’’. Say what! Yes, that hurt a little bit.
Why did this hurt? Here I thought I was on the right track, studying the Word committing God’s Truth to heart, for times like these! It hurts because I want to live a ‘souled’ out life for Christ. I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I want people to see Christ in me, on me, around me and through me. I represent him and so I am on a journey to living my life wholeheartedly for Him, through his Spirit and guided by His Word. Which means yes, if you ask my opinion on something, I’m not going to give you Niclair’s opinion, I am going to seek God first and use HIS wisdom in my response to you. Is that not what you would hope for?
I guess you can tell I was wound up about that, but it also hurt because it’s not my intention to have the ‘holier than thou’ pharisee syndrome. I want to be accessible to people, to my friends, to my colleagues, my family. I want to make myself available to people to confide in me, share with me, pray with me. My desire is to stay close to God and let His Holy Spirit impact my relationships, conversations and interactions I want people to trust me as their fellow sister in Christ, so this whole thing led me to thinking that maybe I need the correct balance, and I began to pray in that regard.
This one comment made me begin to lose confidence in the Holy Spirit within me as I pondered this ‘‘accusation’’ and reflected on my younger days.
To be honest I have always been considered the ‘churchy’ one, the ‘preacher girl’ in the clique of friends. And I never ran away from that. My girlfriends refer to me as the ‘grandma’, not just because I am older, but because I’m usually the more ‘grounded’ one, who doesn’t delve too deep into the risky situations. And I accept that. I am grateful that they have that confidence to confide in me. I am grateful that they trust my opinion on certain things, they trust my advice because they know that whatever I tell them is going to be as biblical as I can get, biblical meaning as truthful according to God’s will and purpose for them.
I have never made apologies for my personality in that regard. And I won’t start now. I grew up a Pastor’s kid for as long as I can remember. I lived the weekly night services, being dragged to church almost every night, homework in tow. I lived the life sitting up in the very front bench, where your parents could see you and being volunteered to take part in EVERY SINGLE thing because that’s what was expected. And while I might have complained and maybe resented it a little at the time, I wouldn’t change a thing because I know that a foundation was being laid and it has helped me to be the individual that I am today. My parents were teaching me how to live a well-disciplined life. They were instilling Godly morals and values, and nurturing virtues that represented a disciple of Christ.
So I will not label myself with the popular ‘pastor’s kids’ phenomenon. I am proud to be a pastor’s kid. No, I didn’t have a rebellious period, if I did, it was my choice to be rebellious, not because my parents were forcing me to go to church. My rebellion was because I was a young teenage girl trying to navigate life and find my identity in this world; and a life strongly rooted in Christianity and church ministry involvement, helped me on my journey to womanhood.
While I accept that everyone’s story is different! This is mine and I am better for it. I say all of this to say, I cannot make apologies for sharing with you THE truth of God’s Word. If someone confides in me or you about something, I believe it’s because he or she trusts the advice that you or I would give. It’s because they know that we will do our best to give you a ‘Godly perspective’ otherwise they would confide in someone else.
Ok, I am rounding up my rant and I think the only way to release my feelings about that comment is to surrender it in prayer:
Lord, help me to not be judgemental, but give me wisdom on what to say to encourage, but also how to say it with gentleness and compassion, with love and kindness. Lord help me to remember that I am not above any one or better than anyone but help me to always trust your voice within me regardless of what people think.
Truth is, after I prayed that prayer, there was nothing that God prompted me, through HIS spirit to change about my ‘too spiritual’ response to that person. I left it at that and made peace with my hurt.
Thank you, Lord, for your Light and Truth.
Here are a couple scriptures that encouraged my heart, as I worked through this:
1 Peter 2:1-6
Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. 2 Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, 3 now that you have tasted that the Lord is good. 4 As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by humans but chosen by God and precious to him— 5 you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house[a] to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. 6
9 But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light. 10 Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God; once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Have you ever encountered something like this? What was your response? What passage of scripture did you find encouraging? I would love to hear from you!