COMPARISON: The Dream-Slayer

A dream frustrated.

Truth: Sometimes I want to kick my dreams under the rug and leave it there!

Listen, I want to be transparent and real with you. Sometimes I get angry, bitter, frustrated; because the ladder I had been trying to climb, seemed to be laid out perfectly steady and stable- for someone else to climb.

And I question God. “Why would you give me this dream, this idea, and not make the way for it to happen like you did for the next person? What was I doing wrong? Why am I not good enough? Is this a dream too prestigious for me to accomplish?

Ever been there?

Every so often I fall victim to the “sit small ‘till your name get called” belief. It’s a saying that I have only ever heard in the ”islands”.  Thinking about it now, it could be interpreted two ways:

  1. “Stay in your small corner, let the ‘big’ (more important, most likely to succeed) names get called first.”


2. More positively, “Do what you can with what you have, until God calls you to something bigger or something different”

And if I am honest, I pretty much began to believe the first version. I believed, when it came to my dreams, that I didn’t measure up. I believed that certain things were unattainable because it just was ‘not meant to be for me’  It’s a painful and destructive loop that encircles our mind. I’m referring to ‘limiting beliefs‘- you know, those incorrect and false assumptions we begin to believe about ourselves which lead to self-sabotage and eventually hold us back from everything that we are totally capable of and desire to achieve.

A passage of scripture that I revert to when I get caught up in this despairing mindset is found in Jeremiah 29:11. It says ‘For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’’ so I have a choice to drop the former and run with the latter believing this for myself, believing that God has greatness already written onto the pages of my story. I am reminded that when I get frustrated, to take a pause and ask God to help me to trust what HE has already established in my future and to be obedient to follow His lead.

A dream  revived

I know there is room for everyone to win and that we should all share in each other successes. I am all the way there for it. For me, it wasn’t about not wanting others to succeed, and it wasn’t about racing ahead of someone else.
It was more about, ‘well God what happened to me? Why am I not good enough? Why didn’t you tell me the success secret as well? I was constantly putting myself down and making myself feel small because I felt unworthy and incapable.  I accepted the idea that I was being ‘pushed aside’. I was falsely conditioning myself to think that there was no more room for my ideas, my dreams, my goals.

There is room for all of us. From before we came to being, God had written the script and left the opening for each of our talents, giftedness and dreams. Why wouldn’t he? HE bestowed them upon us!  I am not declaring this because I want to echo the words of a mentor, a life coach, my pastor, Oprah… I am declaring this because it is an absolute fact that GOD made you. HE designed you and placed you here, at this moment, wherever you may be sitting and reading this. God has orchestrated this very moment to be a part of your life, -a life that He has filled to the brim with purpose. God doesn’t create anything that is useless. HE creates with purpose for a purpose. SO before he ever designed you HE had opened the space for all that you will be and all that you will do for His Glory on this earth. BE encouraged by that.

Your purpose, your dream is being realised even in the mundane. And when you attach those desires to the heart of God, it doesn’t matter if you perceive your piece of the ‘pie’ to be big or small. It has purpose sprinkled all over it.

If God has anything to do with it, its impact is already greater than anything that you could ever dream or imagine!

Comparison is the thief of our dreams

When we begin to look at what the next person is doing, when we dwell on how they are thriving when we wonder and obsess about their secrets to success, we begin to feel what I call the 3 D’s: Discontentment, Dissatisfaction and Discouragement. Comparing ourselves to others removes our focus from Jesus and, suddenly our portion seems small and insignificant.  Doing our ‘everyday’ part feels unsatisfying because we become self- absorbed and try to fill a selfish desire for recognition, acknowledgement, and personal achievement.

Reflect on this verse from Galatians 1:10.

Gal 1:10 For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.

A dream surrendered

I know it’s real hard to get past those feelings, because we ‘r e human. I can tell you from experience.  As I sit here and reflect, my thoughts go to a scripture I took to be my personal reminder and motivational theme for this year in 1 Cor 15:58:

”With all this going for us, my dear, dear friends, stand your ground. And don’t hold back. Throw yourselves into the work of the Master, confident that nothing you do for him is a waste of time or effort. ”(The Message)

This was encouragement to me and helped me redirect my focus on what was important, what I do is not for my personal gain or accomplishment, My life is a song of worship unto God. My tasks, my ‘everyday’ stuff is to glorify Him. God has sewn purpose into everything He has tasked me to do so I should give it all I’ve got! Whatever the responsibility God has given us, great or small, grandiose or seemingly insignificant to some, HE has sewn purpose into it. A purpose that is supernaturally inspired to showcase His Sovereignty and bring Him Glory.

So whatever it is you are hoping towards, dreaming to accomplish, don’t lose faith. Commit your heart desires to Christ and trust Him with it. Psalms 37:5-6 says

”Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn…”

Friends don’t allow comparison to steak your joy and your dreams. Instead allow your heart to be filled with God’s truth and promises.

Stop comparing, keep dreaming and Stop Doubting, keep trusting!

Published by Niclair

Hi ! My name is Niclair ! I am a Caribbean girl currently living in the UK with my husband and 2 awesome little princesses that keep me busy! I love God and I love that HE has a special plan and purpose written for every single one of us and I'm on a mission to live find uncover mine and live life abundantly. I hope you are inspired and encouraged by my journey!

2 thoughts on “COMPARISON: The Dream-Slayer

  1. This resonates so deeply for me Niclair!!

    sit small ‘till your name get called

    I loved how you reflected on this in different ways. I don’t want to live a life of playing small. I want to be humble enough to be patient for my moment to rise and elevate but I as I am waiting- I’m waiting in great expectations.

    Comparison is something I monitor often. I always try to hold on to what the vision God has placed in my heart.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: